Satire
Ireland
Technology
Irish Water Meters Now Predict Your Future Via Tea Leaves
Irish Water has upgraded its smart meters to include tasseography, allowing them to predict the future by reading tea leaves in the water supply.
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The FY Times Staff
Published on
Read time
2 min read
Tasseography Tech
Uisce Éireann upgraded 600,000 smart meters with integrated tasseography modules; 87 % accurate at forecasting ‘minor plumbing disasters’ by reading sediment patterns in the flow chamber.
Factual nugget
600,000 meters installed; network leaks cost €400 million yearly.
Nonsense twist
One meter in Kerry predicted a TD’s affair with an electric kettle.