Local Man Tries to Cancel His Own Birthday, Friends Throw Surprise Court Hearing

Every year Chris begs everyone to ignore his birthday. This year his mates hired an actual courtroom, a bailiff, and a judge (Dave in a wig from Amazon). Chris was served papers titled “The People vs. Christopher – Crime: Being a Legend.”
Witnesses gave tearful testimonies about his kindness. Evidence included photos of him helping people move house and a 2017 video of him singing karaoke to Shania Twain. The jury (all his drinking buddies) deliberated for six minutes and sentenced him to cake, shots, and compulsory fun.
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He lost the case and still has to wear the “Guilty of Being Awesome” t-shirt in public for a month.
Tag the friend who hates their birthday – court is in session!